The Bend in the Road

🌿  The Bend in the Road  🌿 

A Personal Reflection by Verna 

  

Dedication 

For the friends who listened without judgment, stayed without questions, and reminded me that courage does not always roar. 

 For those who offered quiet support instead of advice, understanding instead of pity. 

 ___________________________________________________________________ 

 The Bend in the Road 

 Two years of waiting, just checking things out, 

 Endless appointments and shadows of doubt. 

 Then the answer arrived and the mystery cleared, 

 It was the very roadblock I secretly feared. 

 The nights are the hardest, just staring awake, 

 Anxious of changes and choices to make. 

 I could use some support, yet pride bars the door, 

 Not wanting to burden a soul anymore. 

 At times it feels like a battle fought all on my own,

 Unsure if I'm ready to make the whole story known. 

 So I've kept it close, confiding in a trusted few, 

 Old friends who understand and quietly see me through. 

 I don't want your pity or sorrowful sighs, 

 Just gentle compassion from understanding eyes. 

 No questions are needed, no details to send, 

 Only your quiet support as I wait for the bend. 

 I have apprehensions, yet I'm braving this storm, 

 Holding on to hope and keeping my spirit warm. 

 Though shadows may linger and doubts may begin, 

 I carry a brave soul, and I know I will win. 

 Like a fallen soldier, I'll gather each piece, 

 Speaking kindness to myself until the inner storms cease. 

 The future is unwritten, but I'm standing my ground, 

 Ready for whatever the next chapter has found. 

 And somewhere along this uncertain way, 

 I've learned that strength isn't carrying everything each day. 

 Sometimes it's letting others walk beside you awhile, 

 Accepting their kindness, their presence, their smile. 

 The road ahead may twist where I cannot yet see, 

 But fear will not have the final word over me. 

 One step at a time, with faith as my guide, 

 I'll face what comes next with courage by my side. 

 ✨ Personal Note This poem marks a turning point in my journey. It is about learning to release a burden carried quietly for years. It is about accepting support, setting boundaries, finding strength in vulnerability, and choosing hope while facing uncertainty. The bend in the road is not the end of the story. It is the place where fear begins to loosen its grip, where healing begins, and where a new chapter quietly unfolds. 

 October 2026 Written during a season of healing, reflection, courage, and renewed hope. 🌱 "The future is unwritten, but I am standing my ground." 🌱

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Mixed Emotions...

It's been weeks that I have been having thoughts on moving on and taking a different path. It seems that what I'm doing now is not making me happy anymore. I have been dabbling into cooking, talking my old friends and contacts which makes me more alive and excited. Seeing these people made me realize and recalculate my steps on the next best steps to do. That means doing what I'm good at. Follow my passion in cooking and baking, complete all my plans in the next few months, put a sizeable capital for another business then pay off all my payables etc. Which is working my butt out then start off with a clean slate too. I haven't discussed my plans with my husband but I hope he would support me on this. Guess it's not good to hide my emotions and worries away that leads to at times waking up in unholy hours at night. Yet I don't want to have him fret on or make it such an issue but the thing is...he might have felt it anyways.. After I went home from Auckland to visit my relatives it seems that my life has been altered in a way. I was longing for a life like that in which its really laid back, no pollution, nice rolling hills and greeneries, fresh air and a park in which I so much adored...In which we don't have those kinds here in the Philippines and honestly I fell in love with the place and wished that I will be with Ven there building a better future. Am seeing ourselves having good opportunities and better lives too. Imagine, my sister told me that even if you work at either Countdown or Pak n Save can actually pay for you gas, rent and food. But such a sad thing here in the Philippines.

My Little One

Though it has been seven years ago that you left for heaven, it's still fresh in my memory that I have felt your touch, seen your smiles and smelled your scent. It hasn't really left my mind. I still cry whenever I remember special dates like the day you were born and important events that lead to you. How I wish I can just go back in time and fix your heart then it will all go away. I hope it was that simple that I have the power to undo everything and you could have been with us. I can just imagine that you would be my shopping partner, my playmate at Time Zone and avid critic when it comes to clothes. But these all are just wishing thinking ....to remind me that sometime in the future we will reunite and spend a lifetime in another dimension. It really broke my heart to let you go but that was the best part of it, being your mom for such a short time but though it was the longest time of my life. It was one of those months that I will truly cherish seeing your first smile and cry. It just didn't come to mind to take a video of you, it could be wonderful to see you still alive. But I know it won't be possible anymore. All I want now is that one of these days you would visit me in my dream and to tell me that you're okey now in heaven. Well, you have both your Lolo Nevin and Valer there with you now. So do with your great grandmother, Lola Maria. They are more than enough company for you. Wishing you peace and happiness and I can always feel your presence and sense it every time your birthday is approaching. You never cease to amaze me...Baby Kirk.... Mommy misses you so much...Love you love you Baby Kirk...

My Game Plan

Life is too short to be miserable. It's really mind over matter that eventhough a loved one is sick I don't need to dwell on the situation that its depressing et all. Am looking at it like a mirror...What I see now is what I get...But I need to continue to be strong, dependable and responsible for this person who's counting on our support to keep him back on his toes. I can't blame other people who doesn't share my point of view yet it's their opinion. I respect it but what's important is, to be the best person that I can be to have another persons life go on.

Game plan? Think straight, pray hard, live as if this is your last day....bring out the best in everyone you meet...be kind, generous and compassionate to people that really needs you the most. It may sound melodramatic at times but this is how I am and no one can change it. If others don't get it then I hope they respect my point of view.

Everyday is full of surprises but I guess am awed again with how wonderful life is..how heavy the load maybe, I am coming into full circle. And now is the time, to complete the circle of life.

Maybe, others may not understand where I'm coming from. But for people close to me they know what I mean. There are things that can be left unsaid..kept to your heart and be just a mere fiction on your mind.

Counting Your Blessings

It dawned on me yesterday how lucky I was compared to other people. It just hit me like a bullet when I saw the two naked kids running in front of me. Sometimes, I question myself why I don’t have what other people have and now I can clearly understand the answers to my question. Well, except from the obvious that I’m longing to have a baby of my own. The harsh picture of reality seeped into my senses and I perfectly get what GOD wanted to tell me. There are things that we don’t have but others have and vice versa. We may be childless and others have plenty of kids but there lies a line which I haven’t seen for a long time.

Though painful it may seem but you can’t have everything in this world right? This isn’t a perfect world as what they say.

I even cried thinking that this young mother of three though she may have all the kids in the world which I can’t even have. Though we have the means to feed those kids of hers wishing they were ours. Yet that seems to be a far fetched dream and until this point in time it’s still a wish waiting to be granted. I can always see those two bare naked kids perched on their window looking out for anyone who would pass by to notice their hungry faces. And maybe somehow, someone might give them a piece of bread or a little pack of biscuit. Lucky are those days when they would get one. At times, they would shout at the top of their voices to get the people’s attention and maybe even get a share of our food.

I can see on their faces they wish they can have those plastic loads of goodies to feed their hungry stomach. It came to mind that day that I should be thankful for all the graces we received. But those kids’ end, the food that they need for day to day food existence is so scarce that they would resort to calling our names to let them in our houses to eat a decent meal.

Reality bites. We have to look beyond what’s going on our surroundings to say a little prayer or too for the blessings we receive everyday. We always ask for more without even thinking that we have more than enough on our hands. Actually, it’s already full and at times we’re selfish asking for even more.

When others don’t have the comforts in life in which we have . Looking at those people living on the streets and begging for food; if you were on their shoes how would feel ? The basic necessities in life in which they don’t have. It’s an eye opener for everyone of us that we don’t wish for the sky because it’s enough to eat three times a day, have a cozy bed to sleep and a roof that covers our head. A loving parent, a wife or a husband who takes care of our needs and wants. Unlike those who are suffering poverty right this very moment when they have nobody to share their agony.

Well, everyday is a blessing from up ABOVE. Our very existence is a gift itself that we should thank daily that we are alive and given the opportunity to make a difference in other people’s lives. Yet it’s only but befitting to spare a few minutes of our time to thank GOD for the graces and blessings we receive. We can always be a blessing to anyone if we really want to. A sincere smile and a warm hug from a friend would always be welcome when you’re down and out. A simple hello would do or a helping hand to hold you tight when you’re sad and lonely.

At this point in our lives, hopefully each one of us no matter what color, religion, gender, young or old alike we can cross boundaries to be each other’s blessing.

It’s important to count your blessings because not everyone has what you have right now. Don’t tell yourself that you’re unlucky and give reasons for being so. You are what you make of yourself.

Letting go

Letting go